About El Momma

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Working with a Spirited Child and trying to be a better mom

I don't know which is worse: the fact that my child throws himself on the ground and spits at me because I refused to carry him in the sprinkling rain or the fact that I completely lost my patience with him when he did it?

Clearly, it's my response. I am the adult here. Yes, my child seems to have issues adjusting to change at times. He doesn't like getting wet in the rain or getting his feet dirty in the mud or fire alarms. These are just a few of the things that seem to really bother him. He's only four. So, my fear is there is more to come. But, I digress. At the end of the day, I am the one that needs to change. I am the one that needs to have better responses, better interactions and better direction for him. He is just a little boy. But, as a parent I can learn better ways to deal with him and help him to be a better boy.

There is no manual that comes with parenting. We just have to figure it out. Thank God we have some tools and resources to make our jobs a little easier along the way. Have you read "The New Strong-Willed Child" by James Dobson? I haven't. And, I'm not sure I will. I've heard some positive and some very negative things about his philosophy on raising children.

I also saw a book in the church library today with the title "Raising Your Spirited Child" by Kurcinka. Do you have any experiences with this book? I read a little in the library and liked what I saw. First, the term "spirited" which seems to conjure up better thoughts about your child than the term "strong-willed" or even "difficult." And the brief descriptions I read about the "spirited child" seemed to perfectly describe mine. Here is what Mary Sheedy Kurcinka's website says we can expect from her book.

Raising Your Spirited Child can help you:
  • plan for success with a simple, four-step program;
  • discover the power of positive, rather than negative, labels;
  • understand your child's and your own temperamental traits;
  • cope with tantrums and blowups when they do occur;
  • develop strategies for handling mealtimes, bedtimes, holidays, school, and many other situations.
     
     
    Do you have any suggestions for something else we should be focusing on or reading. I believe what God's word says in psalm 139:14. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 
     
    I know my child is fearfully and wonderfully made. I praise God for his wonderful work in our son.

1 comment:

Marsha said...

Hey Bekah,
Being a mommy can be tough at times...and I think we are our toughest critics. I have been wanting to read Parenting with Love and Logic. I read the Teaching with Love and Logic and thought it was wonderful.
Lots of love, my friend!
M