About El Momma

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Just too tired...

This is the second entry in a series I call "El Real Momma"

The purpose is just to be completely "Real" with you all and real with myself. The internet can be a place of fear and sometimes I am afraid of the consequences and the negative results that could come from over-sharing. Don't worry, I am not going to intentionally over-share. But, I am going to share. So here goes:


Making lunches. Morning or night. The battle is on every single day. Do I stay up, downstairs after everyone is tucked snuggly in their beds and make lunches that need to be put back in the fridge until morning? Or, do I head to my cozy bed and lay down? I usually choose laying down and opt for a 20 minute earlier wake up call in the morning. I know it's probably not the best choice. Making lunches at night would probably save me time because I wouldn't be a morning zombie.

But, honestly, I am just too tired. Too too tired for words. In fact, as I write this I am too tired to finish the thought I started with at the beginning of this post. But, I digress. My point is this: we're all worn out. We probably work too hard, some of us may play too hard, maybe we spend too much time volunteering, or make every dinner from scratch or rush to get to the drive thru for breakfast, because we are too late for any other option or maybe we're just tired from every day life. Whatever it is that is wearing us out, remember to let the guilt go (if I just said "Let it Go" then, the ELs break out into song) and take time for yourself. This week, I will get a mani-pedi. That's an almost promise. What will you do for yourself this week?  The end result? A better you. And, isn't that better for all of us!

much love!
-R

Tonight, in spite of all odds, I made lunches. This is just the part that isn't currently being refrigerated. Now, I can rest peacefully. Good night!   

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Finding our Rhythm, Season by Season, Day by Day

This is the first entry in a series I call "El Real Momma"The purpose is just to be completely "Real" with you all and real with myself. The internet can be a place of fear and sometimes I am afraid of the consequences and the negative results that could come from over-sharing. Don't worry, I am not going to intentionally over-share. But, I am going to share. So here goes:



It's hard to believe in just a few days we will have a 3, 5, 7 and 9 year old in the house. Time feels faster and faster and all I can do is try to breathe and take it slow. All of the Els are in elementary school. There is a crazy rhythm in that. Tuesday folders full of information. Some of it very important, and some of it not important (to us) at all. Activities. One day a week, three of the Els swim. Three days a week, two of the Els play or practice baseball. One day a week, one of the Els attends dance class. Then, we have family activities, church activities and birthday parties for friends. Date nights (sometimes after my rehearsal we have dinner and actually talk to each other!) On top of all of that, there is an enormous amount of homework mainly for our 3rd grader. And, on top of all of that- making it work with four kids- one of our children has extra challenges. So, sometimes that means we need to meet with his teachers and administrators. Sometimes, I need to go to the school to check on him, bring him medicine, make sure he is happy at lunch, etc. It means that often times, I stop whatever I am doing, wherever I am and I put my child(ren) first. Completely and totally first. Oftentimes, lately, I feel off balance. Like I'm not myself. Writing music, having a cup of great coffee with lots of cream, reading scripture, sunshine in the mornings, laughter and late, lazy breakfasts just don't make it into my day. They are some of my very favorite and most life-giving experiences, but when I'm lining up my priorities, putting on eye shadow falls pretty far behind making school lunches for 4 people, on my list of important things to do. Don't get me wrong, I do try to make time for both. But, I will walk around with no makeup on if that's how it has to be. And, sometimes, it just is what it is. 

Friday, we were walking into school and I looked up to see this. Maddux and Trinity holding hands. Walking together. Happy. These are the moments that I would give up every perfect cup of coffee for.
We're different. They are different. I am different. I feel completely changed from the day I gave birth to our oldest. Almost like I am a different person, but not quite. These experiences, every one of them. The good, the bad, the amazing: they have shaped me, molded me and at times, forced me into who I am today. I love making friends. I love connecting with people. I love being a momma. I do not love conflict or feeling like I am bothering someone or imposing or asking for help. That list of things I do not love has become more a part of my life than I would have ever hoped. But, it's okay. I am okay. I am better than okay. I sat in a meeting on Friday about one of my children who needs me to be strong for him and I was. I didn't cry one tear. Not that crying would have been a bad thing, but I just think that it wasn't the right thing for me, that day, in that meeting. And, God gave me strength, patience, peace and wisdom to know when to speak, when to listen and when to give praise.
And, today, our three year old Batman went for his first solo drive. Always something to look forward to, even in the darkest of storms.

Peace be with you.
Love,
Rebekah
(El Momma)