About El Momma

Monday, September 14, 2015

A rhythm that's not my own. A season I will probably miss...one day

I've looked forward to this year of having all of my babies in elementary school. The one year. 
The golden year. 
I've looked forward to it so much that perhaps I'm discovering that my expectations were too high.

We are three weeks in and I'm overwhelmed.
I'm so overwhelmed that when I first wrote that sentence it said "We are two weeks in and I'm overwhelmed."  
Nothing has changed in one week. 
I'm still overwhelmed.
I still have the same daily routines I'm trying to establish.
The same lunches to make.
The same time to get out of the house in the mornings.
The same clothes to wash.
Uniforms to lay out.
Children to remind.
The same thing.
Over and over again until I'm tired of hearing my own voice.
The same tears of frustration.
The disappointment that I can't get it all done and I don't know how to do it better.
I feel lost.
And alone.
But,
I'm not.
Just down the street, across town, around the corner, a state away, across the country (almost anywhere there is a parent) someone is feeling what I am feeling.
I know because she/he told me.
So, I'm telling you, so you'll know too. It's going to be okay.  You are not alone.
You will get through this. 
And, the good news is: it will get better! I promise. 
Maybe not yet.
Maybe you'll still have to wait a few weeks to catch your breath and for your family to find their rhythm. 
But, you will find it. It may not be the rhythm you feel like you are forcing upon your family now. 
It might be slightly slower or completely different. 
But, you will find a rhythm that works for you and yours. 
Don't give up.
Until you find your rhythm, keep doing what you are doing, Momma (and Dad).  
It will get better.

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